We’ve all wanted someone to listen to us, but being a good listener isn’t always that easy.
After all, what benefit is there to listening to someone else? Surprisingly, or maybe not so surprisingly, listening is actually good for us.
Think of it the same way that music makes us feel better. When we listen the right way, we not only make someone else feel good, but we’re helping ourselves too.
Listening Is A Win/Win For Everyone
We’re too tired, too stressed or just plain not interested. The excuses could go on and on like a teenager trying to get out of trouble for being late. We could make excuses or just realize that listening is a win/win for everyone involved.
Okay, so hearing about your co-worker’s new baby’s slobber puddle might not seem beneficial right now, but think of it as practice. If we can listen to things we’re not that interested in, we build critical listening skills.
We already know that being a good listener makes the speaker feel better because they have someone paying attention, but this is how listening helps the listener:
- Become more empathetic
- Improve mental focus
- Learn more about the people around you
- Realize you’re not the only one going through a bad situation
- Feel good for making others feel good
- Learn something new
- Develop a more open mind
The list could keep going, but we all hate those articles that make us scroll forever. These are just a few of the ways both parties benefit just by putting those “listening ears” on. It’s a strange cliche, after all, what else are ears for, but it’s true.
You’ll Build Stronger Relationships
Take a moment and think back to the last time someone ignored you. It hurt, didn’t it? We all get busy or just aren’t in the mood to listen sometimes, but listening helps us build stronger relationships. From personal to professional relationships, being a good listener makes a big difference.
In fact, active listening has been proven to build stronger relationships, and not just romantically. This applies to professional relationships with clients as well. The reason we build better relationships is we start focusing more on the person behind the words. We interact with the conversation more and we comprehend the conversation better. With each improved interaction, the stronger the relationship becomes, which of course, makes both parties feel better.
Listening Helps With Design
Being a good listener is great, but what on earth does it have to do with design?
Great question! Imagine a client is trying to describe their product or service to you. If your face looks more like a mannequin while your brain goes over your grocery list, you’re not going to get every excited about the project. Odds are, you’re going to miss important facts, such as the audience being highly attracted to the color green or how vital having triangle shaped button is.
Being a good listener allows you to listen fully and better retain what the client is saying. Instead of missing something, you’re able to ask questions. The more you interact with the client and listen without bias, the easier it is to fully grasp the purpose of their project and what they want to accomplish. The client’s impressed and you actually feel excited about design again.
Becoming A Better Listener
All of these good feelings are great, but only if we know how to listen. Let’s face it, most of us aren’t the best listeners. We tune out after a few minutes or grab for our phones the moment they make a noise. Don’t feel bad. Most of us don’t naturally have the skills of great listeners, but that doesn’t mean we can’t become better listeners.
A few ways we can all start practicing and improving our own listening skills include:
- Put aside other thoughts
- Ask questions to stay involved in the conversation
- Provide non-verbal listening cues, such as nodding or smiling
- Replay the conversation mentally
- Just listen without trying to interrupt, offer a similar story or fix a problem (wait to respond until the other person is done)
- Be honest (but polite) if there’s no time to talk right now
- Try to remove any distractions
- Listen for key points to empathize with
- Practice, practice and practice some more
Okay, so practicing listening to others all the time might sound boring, but it’s not. Better relationships, new knowledge and all those nice warm, fuzzy feelings from a good conversation are just a few benefits.
Go ahead and build your listening skills. We all need to work this vital skill. Listening doesn’t just make us feel good, but it helps improve our lives, both personally and professionally.
Images:Kevin Curtis,Alejandro Escamilla